Jenine: It took me three years to leave him

April 6, 2020

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My first ex-husband was doing a lot of things he shouldn’t have been doing like cheating and I decided I wanted to divorce him.

Although I have a great family I knew my mom wasn’t going to let me come home. I was disappointed about that, believe me, but I know she did it for her own reason.

It took me three years to leave him.

I hid money. That’s how I was able to leave. You do what you’ve got to do.

I put cash in a fireproof box and hid it in the house.

The second time I made a mistake and married a guy I met at my job.

I wasn’t desperate to be with a man but I was desperate for other things like I didn’t have health insurance. That sounds so stupid but I’m just being really honest.

Listen, girls, you can’t get married for health insurance.

I learned to trust myself. I learned that I don’t necessarily need to be in a relationship. I learned how to do everything on my own. It wasn’t easy, but I learned I can depend on myself to get through tough times.

I prayed a lot and read a lot of motivational books.

I bought my own house after we got divorced.

I really didn’t have any help. I think what helped me was the duplex. I was able to get a tenant in with the rent.

I’m consistently working on myself. I went back to school several times. I have two masters and I’m currently working on my Ph.D.

I read a lot of self-help books. I think I go to school like my source of entertainment instead of going to the nightclub or the bar. To be honest with you, the smart guys are in school. If you want to meet a good man go to the university.

The right relationship chose me. Although I’ve been divorced twice I’m happily married at the moment.

I’m not bitter. I read books on forgiveness. That’s what my dissertation is on…learning how to forgive. When you’re not angry and resentful I think people kind of pick up on that.

It was hard to be able to forgive a person who cheated on you. I would pray for my ex-husband even when I didn’t want to. It helped me to let it go.

I asked to really mean the prayer that I was praying.

I just have so many things to be grateful for. I know my ex-husband did me wrong but if I hadn’t had that relationship I wouldn’t have such awesome kids.

The husband I have now is awesome! He’s a really great guy.

The bible says you’re supposed to forgive people so I just figured out how to do it.

As time went on I was ready and open to be in a good relationship and because I had gone through what I went through I was able to understand this is a good relationship.

He’s very respectful. He takes good care of my children even though he doesn’t have children and I love that about him. He thinks about what I need or what I want…gives me compliments. Always taking me nice places. I think that’s important too. We have fun together. We laugh together. We just compliment each other.

You learn a lot about yourself.

When it comes to the relationship I have now I’m approaching it with love.

I try to give him what I want.

I think the most important thing I learned was how to trust myself and trust my gut and just be open to taking a chance.

I had to trust my instinct that I would be okay.

I didn’t have anyone helping me.

I had to trust myself that I could do it. I would advise anybody that if you take the chance you will be okay. You have to believe in yourself.

I spoke life into myself. I stayed in the word with the bible. I just made sure I had confidence in myself.

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