Aidan: We broke up over a Skype call

November 18, 2019

I wasn’t the one who called it off but we both knew that it wasn’t going to work out.

We broke up over a Skype call.

Maybe deep down I thought I could repair the relationship when I came back.

I was a different person having spent 6-months abroad. That was quite a big development period for me. That set off a whole trigger of events afterward.

I ended up spending the next 3-years just focusing on me and only me.

I found out the hard way. It was a big chance to focus on me as a person.

Even though there was pressure from mum and dad and family I had to shut them out. It wouldn’t have been good for me to get into a relationship just to please somebody else. I had to come to terms with that throughout the process.

It was a lot of reading over that time.

When you’re making a commitment do it for the right reasons. I got into my first relationship for the wrong reasons. Take the time to understand why you’re getting into a relationship. Do you truly love the other person or are you trying to fill some other void in your life?

Am I doing this for the right reasons or am I trying to fix up an insecurity of mine?

There is no rush to life. Just because someone else has done it a different way doesn’t mean you need to mimic what they do. We’re all on our own journey. To compare yourself to someone else’s journey is just going to lead to a life of misery.

Don’t underestimate the value of personal development.

Be okay with being independent. Especially if you’re single it’s a good chance to practice.

Our first date was a disaster. It was the most awkward date. She saw something in me to give me a second chance. Just because your first date doesn’t go great don’t give up. There is hope!

Trust is built on do you say what you are going to do. If not, do you explain why you don’t. Being able to rely on the other person and knowing they are going to deliver.

You can’t have respect and trust without communication. The fewer secrets you can hide from one another the better.

Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you stop working on yourself. You just work on yourself more.

At the end of the day, your family is going to place pressure on you no matter what stage of life you are at.

You don’t want to commit to a forever relationship just because your family says it’s the right thing to do when you know that it’s not. It will cause resentment. That’s not really a way to live.

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